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Big Brother and online Hunger games.

My response to my Theatre professor :)

18thApr 13, 2014 by coreyants
I appreciate your honesty. I think I would have had a different reaction had my grade would have been higher than a C. I have never gotten below a B+ in college or below an A- in theatre at Knox. To be frank, I feel as though my Beginning Acting course with Liz Smith (not real name) which I had every single day was way more challenging than any of the theatre courses here taken so far (yes I realize I'm only in two, but you get my point). I had to work my ass off to get an A- in her course and often got a lot of constructive criticism which made me strive to do better. My acting has never improved in so little time as it did in her class.

In this latest project, I feel like I get nothing but negativity. It's really hard for me to be in such a negative atmosphere. I worked very well in groups at Knox, but maybe I fit in better with the class there than I do here. I feel like I stand out like a sore thumb. I also feel like I essentially went to a great school academically, but have since transferred to a mediocre one based on my experiences thus far not just in theatre but in all my courses here at Goucher. It should be noted I took mostly 200 level courses at Knox not general eds which is why I'm taking those this summer at a local college in GA.

I really am enjoying my women studies classes, but besides my French course (which is hard because I skipped the first semester of 110) and Francois's Brazilian class, I do not particularly feel challenged like I did at Knox. I also feel like Allison's practicum class is not well structured at all. I am use to having clear deadlines and requirements when things are due not having to write my own syllabus. I really don't think I should be blamed if she or any professor would like an assignment earlier, yet never gives me a deadline. I have met all the deadlines I've given myself. Don't get me wrong I love Allison as a person, but I'm just having trouble dealing with such a vague class like this.

Even as the dramaturg for The Mandrake, I feel a lot of my time is wasted and not needed during the rehearsal process 2-3 times a week. When I tried to give some notes to the actors about their tactics and whatnot, it was not well received. Also, not being told your grade in any theatre course, this course or Allison's is more than nerve-racking. I thought I was doing fine in your class since you have never talked to me about these concerns until now. I got my other APRs way before Spring Break (one as early as March 5th), which has given me time to improve where as this is towards the end of the semester..not much time to bring up my C. Even though my GPA at Knox was a 3.67, my GPA does not transfer over, so I have to start all over again, so even a B will kill my GPA since I'm starting all over and taking my french course pass/fail, so only have four grades to be averaged in.

I'm not sure if you know this, but I transferred purely for social reasons. I have one friend here at Goucher. My GIG day was atrocious. I had way more friends at Knox even though I had few to begin with, so I feel as though it's been a tough transition not just socially, but academically. When you have a suite-mate who tells you he is "pretty well off", it puts me off to say the least. Knox was private, but most the kids came from a middle class family like myself and much more diverse racially. Academically, Knox was on a 3-3 calendar, one took 3 classes at a time and the classes were faster paced because the professor had to put a semester course into a trimester 10 week term.

Here is my problem with having a C in your course when I thought I had a A+ in my honest opinion. Attendance and Participation counts 30%. I have been to every class (never missed a class in college a day in my life even when I'm sick, my grades/academics are highly important to me) and have done more than my fair share of participating. Weekly reflection counts 15% and I have done that given only Rachel and I are the only ones. I just emailed Diana before to talk as she is one of the few people in the class I really connect to. She told me quote on quote, "If you are getting a C then almost everyone else should be failing seeing as they've done NONE of the blog posts... But hey at least you're not getting an F..." I don't understand how anyone else could possibly even get an A OR B when this counts 15% of the final grade.

The portfolio counts 10% and there's a brief description in the syllabus. I emailed you to ask about this as it hasn't been mentioned in class, so if I do well on this my grade shall go up. You say it is "not the quality of my work" that's not the problem, but the difficulty I have in terms of collaboration. I feel as though I should be graded for the quality of my work not on my personality conflicts with others in the class. I have never had anyone tell me they had a problem with me and again was not aware of any of these issues as you waited until the end of the semester to tell me. The first gun control project went perfectly in my opinion. I do not remember having problems with this group nor my other group on the green dot training. We're doing project two right now as project 3 would be the fracking project, so 30% of my project grades aren't even graded yet essentially plus the 10% portfolio grade which totals to 40% of my grade in the class not even counted yet.

Everything you said in your email was way more about my personality than my quality of my work in your class. I felt as though I received a C because you were not fond of my personality or that it had more to with my class conflicts in the class which I feel should have nothing to do with my overall grade in the course. Yes, I dominate conversations and essentially I do take charge, but that's Corey and my personality, unless you want me to change who I am, there's not much I can do about that but participate less. I am a speaker not a listener, which I do understand and hope to become a better listener. We have only done a few ensemble building exercises, so I am sorry that I wasn't up to par, but in my opinion, the instructions weren't clear and I did not understand nor comprehend the purpose of these exercises. I try to bring a lot of my own experiences to the table as I have auditioned professionally and whatnot, so I am sorry if this comes across as self centered, but it is not the intent.

I have never gotten a grade for anything done in the class not for my reflections nor projects. If you gave me a rubric which I have gotten in all my theatre courses at Knox, it would have specified my weakness and strengths for each given project. I called my mother in tears and close friends before and they all agreed with me. My mom is a teacher and couldn't fathom how I haven't even received any grades during the course of this semester not to mention I got all my other APO's over a month ago for the most part. I am doing exceptionally well in my women studies courses which IMO are harder.

Concerning my current group project, we have gone above and beyond compared to the other groups. We went to the mall to do a case study on strangers opinions on LGBT issues which is very different from interviewing Goucher students who you're friends with. Everything we do is "offensive" and not good enough. There is always going to be someone offended in any art form (where it be theatre or not). As I said, I am from Georgia, and the terms "redneck" and "hick" are not in the least offensive. I told some of my friends from home this who are "real Southerners" and they LOLed. A lot of these students in the class come from the Northeast where there isn't as much racial diversity as the South. So, there opinions will be different re: race when some of my best friends are African Americans and again I told them what happened and they were speechless. I come from a very different area than most of the class having grown up in South Florida ten years, Suburban Atlanta eight years, and transferring from a small liberal arts college in the middle of cornfields near Iowa to Goucher.

Again, I do think I connect especially well with my group for this LGBT project. You may want to talk to Diana because she agrees 100% with me on the issue which I am facing in class. I am just more vocal about it than my peers in my group. We are working together wonderfully in my honest opinion. I really do like Rachel as we actually have a mutual friend from Knox who she went to middle school with and Jacob is awesome as well! I am sorry if my comments seem to lack sensibility, but I think it may have to do with how I come across than how I really feel. People really have to get to know me to understand the real Corey then they will understand who I am. I may say some things that may offend people in the course in which I am not aware of because I probably have a different intent in what I am saying than what is actually coming across. I don't exactly agree that asking a lot of details about these personal stories are being "rough" because in order to do a tableau in this nature, I have to really understand it. I'm sorry again if this comes across as lacking sensibility, but I do not mean for that to happen. I did not realize I was ever being physically rough with someone and would have liked to have known this as that's not okay in my book.

You honestly did hurt me personally because I saw this critique as a personal attack on my personality and a professor not liking me than my quality of my work which again should be grade not how one thinks about me. I've had professors who loathed me, but I got an A still because my work was good--end of story. I did cry for some time because it just came as a shock because you have never told me this before, and I did mention a while ago if we would be getting mid-term reports and also about my grade, and I was never told a reason to worry which I wish I would have because I could have changed way earlier had you told me this when now we only have a month to go, so there's not much I can do as change takes a couple months not just a couple weeks, but will do my best to do so.

I have taken what my peers in class have said personally because of the negativism of their critiques with little or no constructive criticism. How do they expect us to do better when they just tell us how much it sucks and how they hate it. Note, it's not everyone as some had good suggestions, but a good portion. Again I do not think my personality behaviors should give me a C when my overbearing leaderships skills is just a part of me. Francois told me to participate less because I participate too much in her class because I am so passionate on the subject in which we are studying. I really do wish to have a meeting with you instead of you having to send me another long e-mail back in which I have been writing for a few hours already. I just wish I would have known that I was having trouble with collaborative work because I never got any insight from anyone that I was struggling with this as again I have received zero grades in your course until one month before the semester is over.

I emailed Allison and Francois, both my advisors, with already the possibility in dropping my theatre major over this to a minor. It has really personally effected me and if I am getting a C in a theatre course in which I do not feel challenged in than maybe I should not be majoring in it. I really was looking forward in taking your advanced acting course come fall, but am now questioning taking it all together because of this situation. I give my 100% effort in your class in which should result in an A and not a C as my work is not of C quality. I do not see anything in the syllabus which notes that failing to get along with others will lower your grade. When in fact, it states "Each student will contribute to the project works generated over the course of the semester" for the project % of our grade and have in fact done more than I have had to for that.

I am sorry if I came on harsh in this e-mail, but this really did ruin my weekend/day and I was on the phone with my best friends in tears. I hope you understand that my education is very important to me and a C is not acceptable in my book when I'm going to be over $30,000 in debt for this school when I could have went to UGA for free. My mom tells me to try my best even if the grade isn't what I wanted and I have fact have done that as you can see in the quality of my work. I just wish you would have let me know your concerns much, much earlier than this late in the semester. Thanks for your time and energy for reading this as it's taken me forever so please forgive the typos as I do not have time to go back and edit,

Corey

PS: When is a good time to meet for you? :)

He just responded: "
Well…. You had your say. I will have advising times posted outside my door in the morning. Please sign up for a time. If one of the times on the list is not convenient, let me know and I will make myself available at a time that is more convenient for you.

Best wishes,

Michael"

@andychuck08
etienne
supergoten

PS: Did I put him in his place? LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

Comments

to be perfectly honest it looks like he didnt even read it
Sent by BengalBoy,Apr 13, 2014
to be perfectly honest it looks like he didnt even read it
Sent by BengalBoy,Apr 13, 2014
Sent by Lights,Apr 13, 2014
LOL he better have bengalboy it took me 3 hours to write it -_-
Sent by coreyants,Apr 13, 2014
coreyants LMAO sorry bud but i doubt it, its a bit of a long read, that's some dedication though
Sent by BengalBoy,Apr 13, 2014
the things I do not to get a C Bengalboy
Sent by coreyants,Apr 13, 2014
coreyants
I seriously doubt he is going to change your grade after you insulted his course and the school LOL
Sent by Lights,Apr 13, 2014
I wouldn't have read it if I were him LOL
Sent by Steel,Apr 13, 2014
steel yeah but look what he wrote me to begin with http://www.tengaged.com/blog/coreyants/5340507/im-crying
Sent by coreyants,Apr 13, 2014
well first i responded and said:
"I honestly do not understand this at all and I feel like crying. I have feel like I've been trying my 100% in class also given I am only one of two people who have done the required blogs. I have felt personally attacked in class and have not enjoyed it lately. I have worked well with my latest group and they seem to like me. I don't feel as I deserve this grade when I participate and give my 100%, do the weekly blogs, and etc. I was called a racist as of the last two classes and honestly feel like crying after reading this. You have never told me any of this before now."

then he responds to the 2nd email lights

"Hi, Corey,

Well, I truly didn't want to upset you, though I do feel it is important to be honest with you.

As I mention in my APR, I do know that you are one of the few people who regularly contributes to the blog. And I do know that you always do your work on time, and that you are working hard on the current project.

I will reiterate what was discussed in class the other day: the critique the class gave over the last two days was not aimed at you personally, but at the work, the writing and the presentation of the scene reading. With one exception, the comments were not meant to be personal. You were not called a racist; the critique of the work was that its intention was not clear. It's not yet clear in your parody who is the target of the joke.

The comments I wrote in the APR were not meant to be disparaging, but only to point out specific behaviors that are problematic. Effective collaboration is an important part of the course and the grade. In the APR I suggest ways in which changing your behavior might help you be a more effective collaborator: listen more, pace yourself with the others in the group, be sensitive to how others are reacting to you, be sensitive to how others might feel, don't try to dominate the conversation or the work process.

In class, I have tried to steer you toward better communication, but perhaps I have been too subtle. After your expression of frustration this week, your sense that people were mistreating you, I felt I should think about the class dynamic. I wrote the comments because I wanted to be clear. I'm also happy to meet with you to talk in more detail, offer you more specifics.

I'm sure that, with changes on your part, your final grade will be better than a C. I acknowledge the work you do, and I appreciate the qualities you bring to the work. It is my intention that you should have a featured role in the Fracking piece we are working on. There is no one in the class better qualified to play the ring leader/ master of ceremonies than you are. I will also do my best to mediate the critique of the work in such a way that you don't feel it is personal. But it is important that you think about what, on you part, contributes to the class dynamic.

I hope this helps. And I hope you enjoy the rest of the weekend. Let's talk early in the week.

Best wishes,

Michael"

and what i copied here is my last response to him
Sent by coreyants,Apr 13, 2014
lol this is a whole lot about you and way too much to read
Sent by andychuck08,Apr 13, 2014
long blog lol :P
Sent by supergoten,Apr 14, 2014

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