since I don’t even care anymore
I have two very much senior parents at this point
I have no brothers or sisters
I have no cousins my age I’m in contact with, no extended family
I work remotely so I don’t see anyone locally to be friends with
I live 3 hours from my parents and have minimal friends in my area
I’m not in a relationship either
And if the few people I do things with irl can’t or won’t do something, I have nothing to do but sit on discord, and if no one’s on that just sit by myself watching something
And when my parents die it’ll all be on me to handle and I’ll have even fewer people in my life
It’s soul crushing but I have more money than most people and if I ever say anything it’s like “at least you have money?” which doesn’t even do me any good
So I feel like I have to be a pushover to people or I’ll lose one of the few I have left
I feel like I’m literally always an afterthought to people
And just no one can ever comprehend how just horrifically lonely life is
And I can’t get myself to go to therapy because I feel like I can’t fill an hour with enough problems or I don’t like talking about it in general
And I cried in the shower tonight
Anyways thanks if you read idc how cringe this is what does it even matter
Comments
you know you can message me. you're allowed to have problems. i know the parent thing might be an awkward thing to talk to me about with me in particular but my dad is old as shit and my mom was too so i really do get it and am happy to listen. i might not always reply but you can fill my inbox it'll never bother me
but also send me money it'll help you feel alive
also also you were SO wrong about the total drama winner omg
I know we've not talked much, but you can message me if you ever need someone to talk to. I'll be glad to listen to whatever you need to say. Life can be hard and we all need someone to listen to us sometimes.
New England is boring as shit tell me about it lmfao
I relate to this tons. I am awkward and struggle to make connections. I’ve spent a plethora of time in therapy talking and working through my dilemmas and issues instead of taking them out on random people online.. I can’t leave this comment section without saying anything. Things are tough.. if only life has an instruction manual. Even if you don’t see it, try to remind yourself of the positives in life. Sure it’s not much but when I joined this website and saw you in the HOF and had a chance to talk to you, I respected you. I loved your outspoken personality and your ability to put anyone in their place point blank. I really looked up to you.
It may be a struggle rn but life has its weird ups and downs. Where you sometimes look back on it and laugh at why we were even upset about it on the first place!
Bottom line, you’re a likable person and though not everyone in life will see that, there are some who will so try to be friendly and don’t take yourself away from an opportunity to meet some of those people.
life really is so weird especially nights where everything kinda hits you. Always here for you king & I hope you know that you are likeable and fun and there’s a plan & purpose for you even when it doesn’t feel like it
I was in a similar headspace in 2022 and therapy was a game changer. I was hesitant cuz I'd never been but they're really good at getting to the root of the problem without making u feel uncomfortable. Shrooms also helped reframe my thoughts.
Ugh I feel this... as a trans woman I kind of accepted I'd always be mocked and a joke in society and never treated fairly and I'll be lonely :( although I don't know you super well, I can tell you're a fun person to be around from the small interactions we've had. If you ever wanna rant or talk my inbox is always open to listen sometimes in life we just need someone to care.
its not about what you don't have, but cherish what you have. you can always find things that would interest you. it doesn't necessarily have to be people. find things that you will enjoy.
like go for a nice walk
buy a coffee
read a book outside
listen to some bts etc.
you really dont need much in life to make you happy. all you need is to be happy with yourself.
but also send me money it'll help you feel alive
also also you were SO wrong about the total drama winner omg