#AmandaBynes - You'll hook up with a random at the beach, and after, when you are discreetly trying to shake sand off your ass, the man of your dreams will walk by. Get him!
#LovelyKiss - You'll fly to Australia to attend one of Bynes' inappropriate parties. You'll lock eyes with one of her many, many exes. It's a guy she turned down for being ~too kinky~ but they will be a perfect match for you, and you will pee on their feet after sex.
#Memphis_Grizzlies - Two weeks into your freshman year of college you will be sitting at a table in the student union, drinking black coffee and listening to Justin Bieber on your headphones. You'll look up and a nerdy but cute girl will awkwardly ask if she can share your table. You start talking and find out you have a lot in common.
#Yawnha - You'll meet someone from another school at one of your swim meets. They will also take advanced math and rank vegetables by grossness. It's a perfect match.
#Jessie_ - During the whole two weeks it's warm in Quebec for summer you will decide to visit the beach, for some tengaged on the beach, the way all the cool kids do. In the middle of spamming for keys you'll look up and see a the most beautiful man, doing something equally dorky on his phone. You'll make eye contact a bit, then both pull up Tinder on your phone and match. He will come over to talk to you <3
#Brayden_ - You'll attend a party and get introduced to someone with overlapping social circles. They won't make a huge impression, but then you'll run into them at another get together a month later, and the second time you will have a long conversation and make a connection.
#turkeylover - You'll be in the lunchmeat section of the grocery store. You want ham because it's your favorite, but it's all sold out. You decide to settle for turkey, and are about to grab a package, when a guy walks up behind you and grabs one as well. He says "I'm a turkey lover" and you decide it's fate.
#tbrown_47 - You score Nuggets tickets from a coworker who is unable to attend the game. There's a hot guy in the set behind you, and you start chatting while eating nachos during halftime.
#3pi14159 - You've already met your soulmate. It's your calculus book. I hope you live a very long and happy life together.
#jetsrock12 - You'll develop a flirtation with a coworker that will start off charming and innocent, but quickly blossom into a full blown romance.
#Olympia - You'll get a new mail carrier for your neighborhood. He will be extremely attractive, so you will start casually leaving your house right as the mail comes and making excuses for small talk, which will lead to you slipping him your number.
#RedFabFoxy - You'll match on a dating app with someone with the username FoxLover. You'll decide it's a sign and strike up a conversation. They will ask you out, and you never reveal the correlation to your online username.
#salmaan - You'll be browsing the skincare aisle at Target and see a guy grab a facewash you had been considering trying. You'll ask him what he thinks of the product, you start chatting, and you will find out he often tweets things like "retweet this tweet for clear skin." It's love.
#druu - You'll be at the laundromat, washing your sheets between sexing multiple women in the same day, and you'll see a beautiful woman who is a quarter short on change for her dryer. Since you're such a gentleman, you help her out, you start chatting during your dryer cycles, and feel an instant connection so strong you discreetly text the random you were going to meet later and cancel. You and laundry lass have a fantastic night of dinner, drinks, and ruining the clean sheets.
#ahea7561 - You attend a social gathering for Diabetic Singles, because that's the hot thing. You meet a cute guy with freckles. It's iSandeh. He still doesn't have diabetes, but he's hoping to contract it through sex with a diabetic. It does not work, but there is a ~connection~ and you become the new tengaged alpha couple, dominating Stars and frookies together.
#pinkiepie512 - You meet a guy at a My Little Pony convention. He's a COOL Brony. He compliments your Pinkie Pie costume, and it's true love.
#s73100 - You're at the pet store, buying a Halloween costume for your new pet hamster, and you encounter a guy doing the same. You decide you need to buy the hamsters coordinating costumers and arrange a playdate.
#JohnPopper - You've already met him and blogged "I have a crush on a tengager, is it you?" about them :O BUT WHO IS IT? That only narrows it down to about 50 people. Please double back through all of them to find your one true love.
#JoshGillespie - You and your twin brother will meet another pair of twins and start chatting, because you know, twin thing. Him and the other girl won't be a match, but you and your girl will and you'll start talking daily and eventually ask her on a date :)
The_Kid - You'll meet a nice guy at the mall, you'll be hanging out with some friends and spot him across the food court, and then go over and start chatting, and bond over your smoothies.
blazermaniac94 - You'll meet a nice girl at a church picnic, she will be new to the area and you'll start chatting and telling her all your favorite activities, and offer to show her some fun things to do in the summer. She'll love the outdoors, cats, and cooking, it's a perfect match.
xxLoveWakizaxx - You'll meet a nice guy who doesn't drink or do drugs, and he will be a positive influence on you to get your life together.
Singsongers - You'll meet someone at a karaoke party, both of you will want to sing the same song, and make it a duet.
hwest14 - You'll meet and click with a guy through your local music scene. You'll both be playing at a festival together and start talking and grab a drink together after your sets.
FireX - You will start chatting with a beautiful redhead online. Who is this mysterious woman? Only time will tell!
Burberry - You met a fun crazy girl on the blogs page the day you made your account. She took you under her wing, and you enjoy her bizarre sense of humor and extreme narcissism. It's me, the girl is me, you love me, time to admit it.
Joey65409 - You'll see a cute girl at the gym, so you'll sign up for a yoga class she's in. You will be really bad at yoga, but in a cute way, and she'll be charmed by the effort and you'll start talking. Very romantic comedy.
bomberv - Since you're more than just a pretty face, you will make an intellectual connection with someone in one of your classes. You'll disagree a lot and debate about everything, but also legitimately enjoy each other's company.
NicoleF - You'll join a beer bowling league and strike up a conversation with one of your teammates and discover a lot in common and a mutual attraction.
Ace99 - You'll meet a girl on J-date and take her to Disneyland.
sportsgeek12 - One of my friends was kind enough to link me to your rude blog request. You meet a girl at Walmart. She could have been your perfect match. She's a nice person, incredibly patient, likes sports and reality TV. Unfortunately it was a missed connection, you refused to talk to her, both because you thought she was a braindead sheep for wearing a mask, and also because she was only a 5/10 in looks instead of a perfect 10. But it's okay, keep reminding yourself that women are shallow and definitely the reason you're single.
LexeyJane - You fly to Rhode Island for a party weekend with LovelyKiss and while you're there you and beautybelle click and one thing leads to another. You realize you've always had a burning desire for the ladies, and you and her make a delicious strawberry vanilla swirl of hot lesbian action.
Rhinoryans1995 - You visit the zoo on a nice spring day, and you meet a cute girl at the rhino exhibit. You start talking and bond over having the same favorite animal. You take her out to dinner, and then take her home to show her why they call you the big horn ;)
bamold1999 - One night you're really drunk and you beg your friend Cherry to add you to a skype call with her hot Jewish friends. You ask if anyone on the call is gay, and a shy noodle tells you that he is. You promise to hit him up the next day, and everyone laughs off your drunken antics...until you do start chatting and form an unbreakable bond.
Arik2745 - You attend the Savage Race again and meet a tight blonde. She's a strip aerobics instructor and has a stripper pole installed in her bedroom. She's amazing in bed, and also teaches you some new pole tricks.
ITZ3THAN - You'll meet a nice guy while studying at the library, and you'll click and become friends, which will grow into something deeper.
zachbbs - You attend a nice wine tasting and vineyard tour and start chatting with a guy there about your favorite wines, and make lots of pretentious comments about which flavor notes you can taste. You start chatting it up and you know it's true love when he mentions his hatred of Subway.
BarbraStreisand - You attend a Glee Reunion tour and meet a guy while waiting in line to meet Darren Criss.
MastaManipulator_11 - You're feeling curious about the future, so you visit a fortune teller at a festival. They tell you that you will find love when you're not looking for it, and later that day you are looking down at your phone and accidentally bump into a person. You look up to see them wearing a tshirt with the word LOVE, which you take as a sign, and offer to buy them a drink.
sk8ergal - You'll see a girl at a lesbian club, shaking her perfect tits. You'll go up to her and start shaking yours. It will be a full tit shake-off. You win the tit shaking contest, but she wins your heart.
VanitySmurf - You meet someone dressed as a Smurf at a costume party. You introduce yourself by saying "Hi, my name is Blu but you can call me Papa Smurf."
semajdude - After a decade of trying, your half rate pick up lines work on one girl while waiting in a checkout line. You take her out to dinner, and she's charmed enough to go out on a second date.
Kmartt - Bored and lonely on a random Tuesday afternoon, you decide to go to the movies. The theater is surprisingly dead, just one other solo guest watching the same film, which has a very intense ending. Since no one else is around, the two of you dissect the ending together as you walk out of the theater, and not wanting the conversation to end, you continue chatting over dinner at the diner next door.
jujubee - You develop an ongoing flirtation with a server at your favorite restaurant. One day their shift is ending right as you are leaving, and the two of you walk out the door together chatting, and then go see a movie.