TW: LONG BLOG; LOTS OF WORDS ON ONE MINUTE TRAILERS. IF U DON'T CARE 2 READ PLEASE BE RESPECTFUL AND JUST GO LOOK AT THE CHART LIKE A NORMAL PERSON. KTHX
welcome BACK girls! Pennifer and I sat in our luxurious cytube room (sponsor us) and binged all your trailers! We were slayed by quite a few of youβ¦. But now itβs time to see which ones of you bombed in the box office and which ones of you will be obsecure but beloved films on letterboxd (sponsor us)..........
may the following movie trailerettes please step forward.
You 5 are SAFE. But we do want to say, Nate and Noelle, you both did really well this round and were close to getting to the top 3, keep the good work up!
πππππ'π ππππππππ: At first, I was scared for you. I quickly wrote it off as some blah teen romcom movie that nobody wanted. I know Penny instantly clocked her as a lesbian, but I doubted itβ¦. And then she turned out to be an actual lesbian! And thatβs when it all clicked for meβ¦. So thatβs why Iβve literally never heard of this before because Neflix hates lesbians??? Honestly, thatβs a really big questionβ¦. Why does Netflix hates lesbians? I mean, we all know that answer. Itβs easier to market something to the freaks who fetishize gay men (i.e. tween girls who read wattpad fanfics of male kpop stars are obviously gonna eat up something like Heartstopper) than it is to the ugly losers who fetishize lesbians! Anyways, most of this comment is just be talking about lesbians being paid dust by Netflix, so back to the trailer! It was a really cute trailer! The movie looks super sweet but also, like, sad? I do want to go watch this movie! Keep this up!
ππππππ ππ'π ππππππππ: when i saw u post this i thought ... oh ... cute little safe arc for j2999 this week. and yet this got to me i fear. it was just so fckn charming to see these little teenagers pine over this very mid looking girl. this honestly did get to me it was just so cute and fluffy that it knocked out my predicted winner out of the top 4 WOWWWW. u've been kinda slaying this race so i'm excited to see what u come up with next and if u can keep up the momentum !!
πππππ'π ππππππππ: Hm. I was worried for you when you posted this trailerβ¦. And I was right to be. While this trailer does have some standout moments, It mostly just dragged. It was really long and plot heavy?? And it does look like an offbrand Suicide Squad (2016), which we found this directed by the same person! What happened to having versatility I wonderβ¦. Anyways the main villain is just a copy and paste of Cara last name as The Enchantressβ¦. Yeahβ¦. And the soundtrack was very badβ¦. I wonβt be streaming the album. Fairy lives donβt matter!!!!!
ππππππ ππ'π ππππππππ: this had BIG suicide squad energy (derogatory) and i came to find out it was the same director and yes that makes perfect sense. there were a lot of camp moments in here ('fairy lives don't matter!!!!' is one for the history books, that weird ass wanda maximoff reaction face the troll has while talking to will smith in the car fully took me out) but then that aurora looking ass white girl pops up and that song kicks in and it's like ... eh?? i also just thought this movie looked like ass. like the textures and the colorings and the little troll people were butt ugly. it did not make me want to watch i fear
πππππ'π ππππππππ: YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS this was exactly what we were looking for!!! You really understood the challenge. I love a good mid 00s reality tv infused horror movieβ¦ so this was so up my alley. Itβs also an obvious SAW ripoff which just makes it betterβ¦ This really is a trailer! The special effects were shit, the acting is badβ¦.. Itβs just so good!! Thank you for listening to your critique, we told you wanted camp and you gave us camp! This was a great redemption arc for you!
ππππππ ππ'π ππππππππ: what a BEAUTIFUL redemption from last week truthfully. me and nevra were sort of against including streaming movies this week at dirst bc we rly wanted something that embodied the camp of a direct to video movie ..... and this rly fit the bill of what we were looking for. the shoddy blurry ass coloring of this trailer, the perfectly trashy premise, me and nevra were GAGGED in our little cytube room. the scene at the end of that scifi door opening and the guy, rly embodying some vivacious s6 acting challenge energy, took his time to attack the other characters. very camp. this is all to say AMAZING job this week.
πππππ'π ππππππππ: Yeah, I think the clickrace for this made me have high expectations for this? This isnβt bad or anythingβ¦. It just didnβt stand out. There was no coherent plotline in the trailer? I mean, I know itβs an anthology horror movie so itβs 4 different stories but the trailer is just a bunch of scenes from everythingβ¦. I will say the final clip was kinda gaggy, so I liked that! But overall, this was kind of lacking.
ππππππ ππ'π ππππππππ: i had high hopes for this!! considering it was the only clickracee entry of the week it for sure meant it was gna be all that. and i had heard good things abt this movie. and well. it wasn't bad at all rly, but it just kinda felt like a slideshow of random scenes stitched together. i know the movie is an anthology film where it cuts back to different stories all the time but it's kinda hard to make a trailer for a movie like that? again, it was fine but it didn't make me the most excited to see the movie i do not think
πππππ'π ππππππππ: Gamebot pick!!!!!!!!!!! You knew Penny and I (Especially Penny) would eat this up!!!!! And we really didβ¦.. This was high camp!! The shit animationsβ¦. The twevils serving cunt yasssssssss!!! The scene where Kaycee falls off the balcony and Nigel is like βCheerio!β is so djkhbvdgdhvshfschscgfcshgsgsvghs likeβ¦β¦ This was really girly gorgeous cute! A good pick, albeit a boring one too.
ππππππ ππ'π ππππππππ: this is highkey some real ass pandering to me and i am so flattered. i just love some good ass cinema, and what is the biggest embodiment of that if not the bratz animated movie franchise???? the shots of burdine and the tweevils falling to their deaths in multiple times of this trailer intercut with clips of the bratz's friendship, it's a very carefully edited and well produced trailer that portrays a heartwrenching tale of these girls debuting their fashion magazine and smash hit rock band. tears were brought to my eyes.
πππππ'π ππππππππ: This wasβ¦. a weird choice? Penny and I arenβt too big on action films, and this is a pretty generic one? I mean, casting Chris Evans as a villain is really interesting choice so Iβll give them that! But thereβs truly nothing inspiring about the trailer? I donβt care for the Russo brothers but likeβ¦β¦. Theyβve directed the 3 best Marvel movies (and one of the worst ones) so I would expect something better from them but yeahβ¦β¦ This was just a miss. From the forced comedy to miss βwe donβt need a female James Bondβ playing the token girl in an action film, nothing really stood out to me.
ππππππ ππ'π ππππππππ: this ... erm... well, was a trailer for sure! idk this just felt like a mcu trailer to me?? like one of those movies where u have to know the context beforehand, as i kept watching i felt like i was missing something. first of all am i supposed to buy that ryan thee gosling is of the hood and a trained mercenary?? and omfggg what did they do to my baby chris evans in this movie he does not look good here. overall this just looked very bland to me. i kept thinking this HAS to be based off something and yes after googling i realised it was based on a novel series? bless. i feel like if i knew who THE GRAY MAN was before this i would have cared but without context u just have chris evans and this other old dude nevra probably fancies talking abt how polo wearing ryan gosling is sooo dangerous?? be serious. overall a stumble for u this week π¦
Which means, #Times_Places and #coolkat, Iβm sorry my dears but youβre up for elimination.
You guys must MOVIE CLIP FOR YOUR LIFE :0000000000000000000000000
How MCFYL Works:
You just simply MAIL ME a movie clip! Like, literally any movie clip! But to clarify, we want gaggy, entertaining, slayful, iconic etc etc movie clips! Then Penny and I will watch them, and we will decide who has the better clip and they will stay while the other person dies! Itβs that simple! The faster you send the movie clips, the faster we will move on! You have 24 hours.
