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I Wish To Not Exist

Posts 238 posts

I joined Stars again, lol Jan 6, 2024
It's been so long and SO much has changed, but it's nice to be back, however brief of a stay it may be

Points: 2 0 comments
Shall I enter the Stars house Jan 6, 2024
or nah
Points: 0 1 comments
2023 Game Rankings - 1st Dec 22, 2023
Final Fantasy VI is the greatest game I have ever played in my entire life. It's not my FAVORITE, that's still Omori. But it's the best, and I don't know what's ever going to top this fucking magnum opus of the RPG genre.

This website likes to overuse the word "iconic" to the point where it doesn't mean much. But I gotta say, there is no other word that describes this game quite as well. This game is iconic. There are mountains of moments in this game that will stick with you forever, to the point where I don't even know where to start.

Who is the main character of this game? There really isn't one. Not specifically, anyway. There are arguments to be made for 3 or 4 different characters being the most important, one of whom is the main villain, but we'll get there when we get there. You wind up with a whopping 14 total party members in this game, only 1 or 2 of whom could be considered benchwarmers but they have their own uses in this game and are not filler, even if they should be warming the bench for everyone else. This is a game about the ensemble cast, not about any individual, and pretty much everyone gets their time to shine.

I guess we should start talking about the iconic moments here. Let's start from the start.

The very opening of the game, the first thing you see after starting a new file, is 3 people in mech suits walking across a frozen wasteland. The tone of this game is INSTANTLY set with that legendary shot. Two of them, Biggs and Wedge, are servants to the Gestahlian Empire, while the third, Terra, is being mind controlled by them. Terra is the character you start the game with, as you traverse the wasteland and try to figure out how exactly you got here. She quickly meets up with a professional thief, Locke, and the 2 run off as your initial main party.

https://64.media.tumblr.com/448d4b1b41532dbf78986715c3cbe982/b37014560d3a70cf-9e/s540x810/ca8618a8e32e1ea27000f83cd0445d64ffdd206b.gif

The Opera House scene is a 11/10 scene, every single element is perfect. One of your party members, Celes, is a lookalike of one of the performers in tonight's show, Maria. A note was sent to the man in charge of the show stating that Maria was going to be kidnapped by one of the only airship owners in the game, Dartz. Everyone collectively decides Celes should take Maria's place in the show tonight. Meanwhile, COMPLETELY INDEPENDENT OF EVERYONE ELSE, another fucker you've fought a couple times through the game so far is trying to sabotage the show by dropping a huge weight on you. Everyone is aware of all this and there's schemes on top of schemes on top of schemes, but the show must go on in order for anything to work. So Celes takes the stage.

Now, I played the Pixel Remaster version of this game, so it had the old art style but touched up a bit. One thing I did NOT expect, though, for was for Celes' performance to be COMPLETELY VOICE ACTED. The one and only instance of voice acting in this entire game was to give a show stealing rendition of an opera song written for this game, Aria De Mezzo Carattere. The entire Opera House sequence is one of my favorite sequences in all of gaming. I genuinely wish I could go back and experience this again for the first time.

https://media.tenor.com/iyLx8y1mkpQAAAAd/final-fantasy_6-final-fantasy-vi.gif

AND WE AIN'T EVEN HALFWAY THROUGH THIS GODDAMN GAME YET, BABY!

It's at this point where I must now bring up the primary antagonist, Kefka. He starts this game as nothing more than the Gestahlian Empire's court jester. Just a literal clown who is there to be funny. But this motherfucker is more evil than anyone. His first big moment is poisoning a town's water supply from a distance/the source so they all start dying. He does, of course, kill off the king of the empire and take his place, but it's what this absolute monster does at the midway point that etches his name into the annals of villain history:

He destroys the world. Successfully. You have to watch as the planet literally falls apart and is reduced to rubble. Your entire party is scattered except for Celes, who takes over as the de facto leader who has to put the gang back together and sort all this shit out again. ...after her suicide attempt, of course, which you have to control. You have to guide her up the cliff she then throws herself off of. This, immediately after watching Celes' father figure die, which comes immediately after you watch the world get destroyed, is a one-two-three punch of harrowing shit that will wake you the fuck up and kick your ass into gear for what is yet to come.

Once you get everyone back, you can go face the monster that is Kefka. Except he's not a court jester anymore. He now controls the magic of the universe and has ascended into godhood. He descends from the heavens as Dancing Mad comes on and instills the fear of God into you. And you know there's nothing you can do but fight.

No write-up I do could ever hope to do this game justice. I don't know what the hell I could ever play after this that would hope to match up to the icon status of this masterpiece. Every good thing you've ever heard about this one is true. The hype is real. Play it.

https://j.gifs.com/A2wnpW.gif

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Points: 86 3 comments
2023 Game Rankings - 2nd Dec 22, 2023
Surprisingly, Final Fantasy XVI did not end up being my favorite game actually released in 2023. That would actually go to a little indie game that wound up winning Best Indie Game at the Game Awards a few weeks ago!

Sea of Stars is a goddamn MASTERPIECE. You play as either Valere or Zale (this choice does not affect anything and does not even really matter that much but it is a choice you get to make), the new Solstice Warriors. They harness the power of the Moon/Sun respectively. At the start of the game, your main objective is to finish training at the academy and prepare to fight the last of the Dwellers, the Dweller of Woe, which will effectively bring peace to the world and prevent the return of the Fleshmancer. Again, this encounter is at the very start of the game, so you can figure out what happens next lmao.

Now, the Fleshmancer is an immortal being, having drank the elixir of life. How do you kill an immortal being? That is a very good question! All this and more will be answered along the way. Also along the way you meet a fun cast of characters, from a wacky group of pirates, to a sentient blob, to a Solstice Warriors fangirl, to the goddamn person that's been narrating up to that point, lmao. Everyone you meet is super memorable in their own ways, whether good or bad.

Also, the visuals in this game are simply stunning. Some of the screencaps I took and sent to friends or posted on my Twitter have been breathtaking. This game is GORGEOUS. The devs made the most of the retro art style and the ability to control the time of day (yes that's a thing they can do lol) to make every single location you visit POP. This game is a feast for the senses, as the music is also one of the best soundtracks to a game I played this year.

The combat in this game is fantastic too, it's a unique system I haven't seen done anywhere else before. It's turn based like most other rpgs, but where this game differs is choosing the order your party goes in and working around the timers and locks of the enemies. You can completely cancel an opponent's turn by hitting them with the right elemental/physical attacks enough times! You can also take advantage of Live Mana (which spawns after physically attacking an enemy) to either charge up your next magic attack or add your character's element to their physical attack.

OK, I wanted to see how much I could say about this game without mentioning Garl even once, and I think I made it a fair ways in! So let's talk about the best goddamn character in this game now. Garl is the beating heart of your adventure. He may seem like just comic relief at the start, but that is NOT the case at all. This man is a bonafide warrior in his own right, or I suppose warrior-cook is what the game calls him, since he's also a chef to some degree. It becomes very easy to get attached to this man, and while I can't say too much without spoiling the game, his arc is one you will never forget.

Unlike the other 2 games this is tied with, I don't think there's a single element that could be improved on in this game and have never heard anyone argue that point in any of the discussions I've had about it. Sea of Stars is a masterpiece which will make your life a little better for having played it.

https://i.imgur.com/gYcprUP.gif

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Points: 64 1 comments
2023 Game Rankings - 3rd Dec 20, 2023
I actually took a week of PTO from work when this released just to play through it. I barely even got halfway. This game is PACKED with stuff to do.

This may be a hot take since I've seen plenty of people hate it, but I personally thought Final Fantasy XVI was pretty damn incredible. I'll get the easy part out of the way first: The combat. The combat in this game is soooooooo much fun. Yes it's basically just DMC but with Eikons but I am super down for that, it flows super well and the magic the Eikons add can lead to some gnarly combos.

The story here is that magic users are essentially slaves, treated like second class citizens by those without magic, despite the fact that their world NEEDS Bearers to even survive. You play as Clive, Ifrit's Bearer and older brother to the heir to the throne of Rosaria. One night, your king and army are on a journey to some talks in another kingdom when... AMBUSH. King dies, Joshua dies, you're kidnapped, and that's where the prologue ends. From here on, it's a tale of figuring out what happened, as well as restoring the world's balance.

There's a wide variety of fun characters. The protagonist is one of the series' best (to look at) and kicks all sorts of ass. Jill is a great tertiary protagonist and her role in all this is great. Torgal is the best dog ever and the fact that there's a trophy for petting him brings me peace. And then there's Cid, the name that returns in every single FF game. This is the best usage of Cid in the series, hands down. The dude is straight up badass, as well as hilarious. He steals the show every time he's on screen.

I feel like writing about why I loved this game in particular is harder than most but I did love the hell outta this game and do not regret putting it this high in the slightest, lol.

OH ALSO THIS GAME HAS THE FIRST CANONICALLY GAY CHARACTER/KISS IN THE FRANCHISE, BAHAMUT IS NOW A GAY ICON

https://media0.giphy.com/media/U3e0Rpw91GXtr8JD93/giphy.gif

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Points: 68 2 comments
2023 Game Rankings - 4th Dec 19, 2023
I'll start this off by saying 2-4 is basically a 3 way tie. Ask me again in a week and I might have these 3 games in a totally different order. All 4 of the games remaining are currently among my top 10 favorite games of all time.

...And 3 of them are from the same franchise! Yall knew I wasn't done with Final Fantasy yet! What game did I play this year that went toe to toe with one of my all time favorite franchises and was equally as great? You'll have to wait and see. For now though, let's talk about Final Fantasy IV.

Point blank, this has arguably the strongest individual character's arc of any game on this list. The only real competition I can think of is Toshiro from Persona 5 Tactica, but nah this game clears his arc. In this game, you play as a man named Cecil. He is a Dark Paladin. At the very start of this game (like, during the opening sequence) you start off this game heading back to your kingdom having just finished razing a small town, killing nearly everyone in it. At the end of the game, you're a Paladin, saving the world from the evil forces that were controlling everything. Your former boss. Nope, you weren't mind controlled or anything, you were committing all those heinous acts by choice. How do we get from Point A to Point B? Well, that's on you to find out for yourself.

The story is the main selling point for this one. It's incredibly compelling, even if it may be a little cliche, it's spun so well that I didn't mind at all. Your party is essentially a revolving door of a cast of memorable and likeable characters. I loved the ensemble cast so much I actually got my partner to pick up a poster of the FFIV cast at an anime con back in like July or August.

There's plenty of memorable moments, from having to go back and actually see the carnage you caused, to having to head to the goddamn moon for the final act... And ofc there's the showstopping moment mentioned above, the exact moment where Cecil changes from a Dark Knight to a Paladin. The exact point where his redemption begins.

This is a tale of redemption. Because there's no way Cecil can go back and undo all the horrors and atrocities he's committed. He's taken countless lives and burned cities to the ground in the name of evil. But he can stand up and make sure nothing like this ever happens again.

Play this goddamn game, yall. It's amazing.

https://media.tenor.com/9f8y0vFvgFcAAAAC/ff4-final-fantasy4.gif

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Points: 63 2 comments