"If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I don't want to do it. It takes too long." -- Glenn, age 7
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"I think you're supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isn't supposed to be so painful." -- Manuel, age 8
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"No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell. That's why perfume and deodorant are so popular." -- Mae, age 9
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"Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too." -- Greg, age 8
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"Once I'm done with kindergarten, I'm going to find me a wife." -- Tom, age 5
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"On the first date, they just tell each other lies, and that usually gets them interested enough to go for a second date." -- Mike, 10
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"My mother says to look for a man who is kind. That's what I'll do. I'll find somebody who's kinda tall and handsome." -- Carolyn, age 8
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"One of you should know how to write a check. Because, even if you have tons of love, there is still going to be a lot of bills." -- Ava, age 8
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"Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me." -- Dave, age 8
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"I know one reason kissing was created. It makes you feel warm all over, and they didn't always have electric heat or fireplaces or even stoves in their houses." -- Gina, age 8
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(on seeing a couple kissing) "He is trying to steal her chewing gum!" -- Boy, age 6
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"It isn't always how you look. Look at me. I'm handsome like anything, and I haven't got anybody to marry me yet." -- Brian, age 7
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"Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold. Other people care more about the food." -- Brad, age 8
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"Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love." -- Alonzo, age 9
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"No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married!" -- Freddie, age 6
"On the 2nd day the knee was better and on the 3rd day it disappeared completely."
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"Discharge status: Alive but without permission."
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"Patient has left his white blood cells at another hospital."
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"Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch."
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"She is numb from her toes down."
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"Patient has two teenage children but no other abnormalities."
Lawyer: "Can you describe what the person who attacked you looked like?
Witness: "No. He was wearing a mask."
Lawyer: "What was he wearing under the mask?"
Witness: "Er...his face."
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Lawyer: "How old is your son, the one living with you?"
Witness: "Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which."
Lawyer: "How long has he lived with you?"
Witness: "Forty-five years."
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Lawyer: "You were there until the time you left, is that true?"
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Lawyer: "The youngest son, the 20 year old, how old is he?"
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Lawyer: "Were you alone or by yourself?"
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Lawyer: "I show you Exhibit 3 and ask you if you recognize that picture."
Witness: "That's me."
Lawyer: "Were you present when that picture was taken?"
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Lawyer: "Now, doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, in most cases he just passes quietly away and doesn't know anything about it until the next morning?"
