And I'll tell you what will happen to you on December 21st, 2012.
Dylanrules90210 Busily jacking off to pornhub, you dont realize that a fissure has opened up and you fall in.
mrkkkkyle You're at the zoo when a radioactive crocodile suddenly jumps out and bites your head off.
5651Omar Seeing mrkkkkyle get eaten by a crocodile, you run to the panda exhibit, chop off a panda head and hide inside. Unfortunately the head is too heavy to lift off, and you suffocate.
DevinWithParasites You investigate 5651Omar's death, finding his corpse in the giant panda. But as you reach in, a panda rib pierces your skin, and you die because of all the ringworms that infect your body.
buzzjimymufanman While on the lift up a ski slope, it suddenly lurches forward and you get impaled by a pine tree.
Khianna While accepting the Mother Teresa award by the President of the United States, a giant portrait of her falls and kills you.
chad123 You're singing the ABC and 123 song to a group of elementary schoolers when you suddenly forget what comes after the letter L. Enraged, the children jump you with their knives and spoons and you bleed to death.
ILoveSleep Ignoring the evacuation alerts, you groggily fall back into bed before being raped in the ass by cwmoon . Before your ass bleeds completely out, you rip off cwmoon's penis and you both die.
Soccer_man9 You're running away from a giant fissure that opens up in the ground, but someone kicks a soccerball at you and you fall in.
sjsoccer88 You kicked the soccer ball that killed Soccer_man9, so LadyPink says "FUCK YOU BITCH" and shoots you with a gun. Unfortunately, the blood impairs LadyPink's vision, and she runs into a chainsaw and dies as a pile of organs.
Kizzi You die because you don't take showers
Ingrid You're competing in "Hold your Wee for a Wii" As you drink your 25th bottle of water, the whole building collapses and you are crushed to dust.
Crazy_Clown123 You jump into a claw machine hoping to get free teddy bears, when suddenly the claw comes down and grabs your blonde hair, ripping it off. You scream for help, but while pounding on the glass, the lid slams down and you suffocate to death.
titan24maniac You're cell phone keys aren't working, so you keep pounding them with your finger, hoping it will work. However in your desperation, your bone rips through your skin and accidently penetrates the cell phone, causing you to be electrified.
ninjakitty You go to New York City and buy a hot dog from a vendor, when suddenly a zipper opens up and a dog comes out of your hot dog, and says "FUCK YOU KITTY" And eats you instead.
AllysonCX You fumble with your keys, trying to open the door to your house, when suddenly Hydrochloric Acid starts pouring out of the keyhole. In horror, you run to the local Chemistry store and rub yourself with Sodium Hydroxide to neutralize it, but a horse bursts into the store and runs you over.
Horrorite While at the movies, watching Paranormal Activity 2, a giant centipede picks you up and lifts you out of the top of the theater. screaming, you pull one of the centipede's eyes out and it drops you-into the open jaws on a shark.
Marekk27 You bought a new laptop, and show it off to your friends. Hmm, you wonder, what does this button do? Suddenly the laptop gets brighter and brighter and Bo_oM! Explodes! You fly into a river and get trapped under a rock, where you cannot move while giant pirahnnas strip off your flesh.
SweetRem You decide to go to the flower shop, to buy flowers. Suddenly, you trip over a rock and are thrown into the mouth of a Venus Fly Trap. Fortunately, it said "Don't worry hunny, I wont eat you." Unfortunately, a runaway train crashes into the shop and runs you over.
Dash You're hiking in the mountains when a wild bulbasaur appears. Suddenly, a volcanoe erupts and you hop onto bulbasaur as he swings from tree to tree to escape. Unfortunately, a wild SudoWudo grabs you, and rapes you to death
tommarkoliver You're on a plane when suddenly a huge bolt of lightening strikes and the plane starts falling towards the ground! Everyone screams, but you fall into a huge pile of mashed yams and are the only one to survive. Unfortunately, you landed on Mount Everest, and you get stuck, frozen in the mound of yams.
peace123 You go to DisneyWorld, and go to the Teacups. They're spinning merrily when suddenly a giant earthworm explodes from the ground and starts eating everyone. You run away and hide in a pizza shop for shelter. Unfortunately, your head explodes and you die.
Darrel42 You're hoeing in your garden, getting those carrots to tip top shape when you notice a carrot that has a bug on it. You lean over to inspect it, and let A HUGE ONE rip. You get propelled into the ground, where the carrot stabs you in the eye and kills you.
SexyBanana You're pleasuring yourself with a banana, when your mom walks into your room and says "WTF are you doing" Suddenly, a zipper appears on your mom, and a giant banana pops out from its disguise. "I wont kill you, if you make this a three-some" he says. You oblige, and congrats! You survive :)
roachster10 You're sweeping your kitchen floor when suddenly thousands upon thousands of cockroaches start swarming your floor. You grab your surfboard, and you ride the roachs all the way to your neighbor's home. Unfortunately, you hit your head on a chandelier and you die of blood loss.
dmann You're at the dropzone at Six Flags, when suddenly at the highest point, you fall out of your seat and plummet towards the ground. fortunately, there is a bouncemat at the bottom, and you bounce back up. Unfortunately, you land in a sausage caser, and you are ground up into a sausage for the guests.
riley070391 You're traveling in Taiwan, visiting the Top Floor of Taipei 101, when suddenly a Tsunami hits, knocking the entire structure over. You get swept away and eaten by a giant whale, where you meet Jonas who kills you for dinner
lemonface You're out grocery shopping when a bomb explodes and a whole section of lemons fall into your cart. "NO, I"M NOT GOING TO FUCKING MAKE LEMONADE" you say angrily. Enraged, a giant orange stuffs your head with a giant lemon, then cuts your head in half and squeezes your brains out, and drinks you for lunch.
laidback27 You're at the beach, when you see a deflated beach ball. You decide to blow it up, so you start blowing and blowing and suddenly you get sucked inside out into the ball, where a giant hot dog picks you up and eats you.
Violet101 You go to your wrestling match, but find out you're 2 pounds above your weight class. So you take a knife and cut your arm, ripping a piece of flesh off. Unfortunately, its not enough so you saw your leg off, to get to the right weight. However, while walking to the gym, you step on a wire and you're blown into a million pieces around the room
Caliboy You're on facebook, when suddenly the internet stops working. In rage, you throw your laptop out the window, but your foot gets caught in the power cord and you get thrown out as well. Fortunately, a seagull catches you. Unfortunately, it opens its mouth and 5 electric eels electrify you to death.
Bridgette77 You're drinking orange juice, when you think hmmm "I wonder what it tastes like after I brush my teeth" so you go upstairs, and trip over the first step, and land face first on a rusty nail. You slip down the stairs, and the nail completely rips apart your face and your brain falls out.
AustinRules6969 You get your wisdom teeth taken out at the dentist, and go home to brush up and floss. Unfortunately, you're still numb, so while you floss, you start cutting your gum and rip open half your chin. Blood starts pooring out, and you drown in your blood
MilkisGood You're at the farm when you get thirsty for milk, and start sucking on a cow's titties. Suddenly, you hear a load roar and before you know it, your ass just split open and you die because another cow starts to fuck you in the ass.
NotAfraid You go to the McDonald's plant and tour the facility. Suddenly, a gigantic batch of chicken nuggets falls on you. You manage to eat yourself out, but slip on a stray nugget, and fall right into a blender, where your intestines fly across the room...
jdog ...One of NotAfraid's intestines wraps around your neck and you start choking. You rip it open with your finger nails, and digested nuggets splooge out, suffocating you to death
MikeRORO You're playing fetch with your dog, and you throw a boomerang across the yard. Suddenly, it flies back, hitting you in the head and knocking you out. Your blood leaves your unconscious head and flows to your penis, where you get a hard on and your dog rips it off believing it to be a bone.
TBIBetch You're out canoeing when a giant mushroom appears out of the water and says "Follow me" You refuse and it angrily picks you up and throws you into a whirlpool where you get sucked into the center of the earth
DonutDude556 You're cooking tomato soup when your shirt suddenly catches on fire. You run outside to the well, but trip on a rock and fall inside it. Before you reach the bottom of the well, your head burns up and falls off, and you smack into the stone wall, sliding down, leaving guts and organs along the way
Dorothy You're at the library when suddenly an Earthquake hits and the whole building starts shaking like crazy. You run towards the exit, but a falling bookshelf completely severs your leg. Thousands of pages from books fly around the room, and you get a million tiny paper cuts, dying of blood loss
loldude101 You're at the movies when your friend texts you a funny joke. You start laughing so uncontrollably that you get out of your seat and start to have a seizure, and you crash head-first into the screen
idgaf You're driving in a car when suddenly the brakes stop working. Your friends throws you out of the car and you hit a tree, and a branch impales you right through the heart, but before you die, a giant truck runs right into your abdomen, splitting you into two.
sethbenjamin You're out on a nature hike when you wander off the trailer. Suddenly, a giant fire ant turns towards you, and you throw a rock at it. Enraged, it picks you up and eats you, and you dissolve in its stomach
DianeRhea You're at a buffet when a huge turkey falls from the sky and lands in your mouth, choking you. Sputtering, you go to the bathroom where you swallow the turkey whole and have a massive diahreeah and your ass splits open, killing you.
Awesomeboyherelol You're at the zoo, and decide to feed the whales. Suddenly, one squirts a giant stream of water and you fly all the way to the Africa section where an elephant steps on you.
Unit8890 In an effort to escape, you race to a plane, but forget to take your breast implants. Suddenly as the plane lurches up, you explode into 100 pieces
Jimboslice You have an intense dislike towards cow, so you go to the farm and shoot a cow. However, you slip on poop and have a heart attack after being crushed by a cow carcass
Swimboy818 Chewing a piece of gum, you accidentally dip it into explosives and blowing off your jaw.
AwesomePerson You decide to have sex for 24 hours, and die of a heart attack for digesting a whole bottle of Viagra
sportsgeek12 You're parachuting when suddenly, the string breaks and you fall into the back of a truck full of explosives, setting it off, and blowing you into a million pieces
joshie93 You're at Yellowstone National Park when a gigantic boulder comes racing down the side of a mountain and completely flattens you to death
Zaktheboss9012 You’re cooking bacon when suddenly a pot falls from a drawer, flips the frying pan, and your face completely burns off with hot oil.
Kittytheemolga You’re singing on stage for a recital, when suddenly, the whole stage cracks and you fall. The heel of someone’s shoe cuts your vocal chord and you drown in your own blood
Bellajennaxo You’re at a nickelback concert when the music starts getting louder and louder. Suddenly, the doors slam shut and you’re trapped. The music keeps getting louder until finally you ears explode and you bleed to death
Zircon You’re at the supermarket when suddenly an earthquake hits and you’re completely trapped underneath a pile of onions. You start tearing up, and soon your eyes burn and explode, while the weight of the onions kills you.
Snowskier121 You’re running across the street when suddenly you trip and fall into a pool of burning tar. It’s too sticky to get out of, and you get burned alive.
SSDZ You're skiing down a mountain when suddenly someone behind you loses control, and crashes into you. You tumble to the bottom of the mountain and realize his ski has completely pierced your abdomen and you slowly bleed to death
