Dylan O. (DBWs):
So after giving the idol to Ryan, I thought I completely saved his game, cemented our alliance, and would flush the idol so only had to worry about the OG Naifaru one. Well an hour before tribal Ryan tells me that he actually also had the OG Naifaru one that some user named Idols found for him (apparently she is amazing at finding idols, who knew). However, Idols and him had a falling out of nowhere and she revealed the idol to ppl in the game? This wouldn't be the first time Ryan's outside relationships came into the game *flashback of Chance calling out Ken/I and calling Ken the n word for being on call with Ryan in HvV*. Good times, good times.
So yeah, Ryan's outside relationships effected the game yet again. Not only that, I became aware of the fact that his pedo allegations are actually real? Like I am hardly on this site anymore and I don't know when this came up, I legit thought people were just calling him a pedo as a joke since they call people awful shit all the time. It's like the boy who cried pedo. Although you should probably listen to the boy in that case in retrospect...
David/I both had a talk about it last night cuz we were both pretty ignorant on the issue, it's just such an odd situation where you know a person and get along with them and suddenly feel in a way betrayed by them doing shit like that. At the same time, it's a question of do we give someone that we know and get along with any benefit of the doubt? Or is that more harmful by ignoring the issue. I feel like it's more the latter.
I'm also a socialist (have I also mentioned I'm a vegan?) and a large part of it is dialectics, the idea that things continually move and change and aren't static, and this applies to every facet of life including human society. The ol' you can't walk into the same river twice because the second time it is a different river. It's about judging things not on one static time or place, but understanding the things that brought them to that place, the material conditions that allowed someone to take that course of action in the first place. I'm guessing that is to do with being on this toxic hellhole of a site, it doesn't excuse the behavior, but tries to get to the systemic issue that caused said behavior and rooting it out so the behavior is gone too. All this to say it's a complicated fucking issue, and one I feel awful for being apart of. At the same time, I haven't fully heard any side of the story, just third person accounts, the situation is so muddied and I'm just lost on how to handle it.
How I see it now is that I just cannot work with Ryan anymore with these all coming up, just like how many people judged the IoI cast for not getting rid of Dan, it's just this really fucking complicated issue where I wanna just get away from it entirely.
Whew that was a lot. I didn't even get to any of the dynamics on my tribe from the last vote... Cuz there weren't any? Like David/myself kinda wanted to throw the challenge to get rid of Kelly for going @ Ben, us, and Sydney in the main chat, but knew it didn't fucking matter as Ethan would win anyway. The challenge was spam so it's not like my efforts could do anything. I gave my normal effort in that I spammed the like 5 people who like me, while blogging and posting in my casting to get like 8 white levels to really make the difference.