I had a blind date yesterday with a girl who was obviously a huge nerd off the bat. Normally I don't play that but she was ok-looking so I let the date play out a little longer. She had some sort of off-brand diet cola harley quinn cosplay look going on, and never shut up about comics in particular ("My favorite is squirrel girl~!"). At one point she left the bar to catch a rattata.
Since I don't give a fart in the wind about any of that I let her go on until somehow the topic changed to watching bad movies. "MST3K is the best, anyone who doesn't like them is sooper lame, nya!" While bad movies with friends can be fun, I despise mst3k. I wish they would just shut the fuck up and think up some good jokes instead of shotgunning terrible ones. Obviously I didn't say any of that, but she wouldn't let the topic drop and finally I admitted I would only watch it if I was high as shit, maybe.
"DRUGS ARE BAD HOKAY." (Who the fuck says "ok" like that???)
That was the last fuckin straw. I stood up and put my hemp fiber beanie decorated with weed leaves on and wished her a good night through a haze of vanilla ice cream-flavored vape smoke. Fuckin nerds are obnoxious as shit. Why did my friends pair me up with this NERD???? If you're a nerd DON'T ASK ME OUT. 420 FRIENDLY ONLY vape nayshhhhhhhhhh
hhh h h hh
I woke up at my computer this morning. I did indeed have a blind date last night but I can only assume it didn't go well because this was typed out in a notepad file I had apparently composed before I passed out. Also the lyrics to Blue Da Ba Dee were printed out next to me. What Are You Thinking? That I need to stop making up stupid stories, holy shit. Nobody will fuckin believe this stupid shit actually happened you supreme idiot. Nobody around here calls it "cola". That's where I lost everybody.
