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The pok3rf4ce's blog

Posts 587 posts

4:40am Mar 12, 2017
Still can't sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a long fucking day *cries*
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3am can't sleep Mar 12, 2017
I've got work in 4 hours. Z_z
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Happy Friday! Mar 10, 2017
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Happy Sunday! Feb 26, 2017
It's a bit like Noah's Ark here - hasn't stopped raining all day and I've gotten soaked just going to the car to pick up some groceries. :(
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My Sobriety Journey Feb 25, 2017
I've been sober for over a year now. Drinking turned me into a horrible person and it segregated me from the people I love. It made me angry, moody and nasty. I was dependent but I didn't realise it until it was too late; alcohol had taken a hold of me.

I went cold turkey and it was painful - not a physical pain like breaking a bone or burning yourself whilst cooking - but in inward pain. I would suddenly start sweating for no reason whatsoever and have tremors at the worst possible times (having a tremor whilst driving is the SCARIEST thing that's ever happened to me!!) all because my body and my mind craved alcohol. Having these moments whilst working was humiliating; I would have to change my shirt at lunch because I would be sweating throughout the day and there's only so many times I could pretend the tremors were because I had a fever. I told a handful of my colleagues what was happening and they were amazing: no judgement and no questions, they just supported me however they could.

In the beginning my mood swings worsened and I was tempted to give in. But looking back, it was worth it. My life has so much clarity now and I can confidently go out and remain sober - the smell of booze actually turns my stomach. I've lost nearly 2 stone purely by giving up the booze and I'm happier now then I ever was when drinking.

I thought alcohol helped me to cope with reality. If anything it made my reality worse.
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Alexis Michelle for S9 Drag Race Winner Feb 25, 2017
#teamalexis
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