MissBriFlorida2007's blog

Confessions of a Beauty Queen

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
Posts 47 posts

LIKE HONESTLY Apr 10, 2011: What is the OC!?!? I'm not trying to be a bitch, like I honestly have no idea!!! Will someone explain!?!?!?!; Points: 134 2 comments
PUBLIC HASH/KAYLICIOUS APOLOGY BLOG!!! Apr 1, 2011: SORRY HASH... DIDNT KNOW they would keep the JELLUS, EGOTISTICAL, OBNOXIOUS, SIPPIN ON SOME MASSIVE HATARADE lethargy over you!!! Next time I'll use Sandy as a pawn in the first place instead of you!!!!!!

LOLZ JK!!!

AND KAY, I'm sorry you LEFT INSTEAD OF ME!! AGAIN!! LIKE SERIOUSLY!!! Everytime I make a move against Sandy, you have to pay for it!! I OWE YOU!!

AND LOLOL LETHARGY... like I know you said you dont mind losing to a RANDOM HOH but like...then you nominated me...and I STAYED... and then I WON HOH LMFAOOOO AND NOMINATED AND EVICTED YOU EL OH MASSIVE EL!!!! LIKE THAT MUST HONESTLY SUCK HUH!?!? Like... YEAH okay 13th to a random Hoh, LAME... mbut like I WON hoh and you still left. LMFAOOOOOOO, shouldnt have been a COLASSAL JERKWAD I GUESS!?!!?

LIKE I, BRIANNA NICOLE KIRKPATRICK, AM A FIGHTER!! I do not step down from ANY CHALLENGE and like, I am not scared of ANYONE!! LIKE!! I have a GORILLA and a PANDA tattooed on EACH OF SLIGHTLY TONED BICEPS and I am like IN CHARGE of my DOMINANCE and like AM NOT AFRAID to like MAKE THE MOVES TO UPSET PEOPLE!! SO LIKE, BRING IT!!!! YAH!!! Like, I am like, a FORMAL FEDERAL AGENT WELL NOT REALLY BUT KIND OF like I was TOTES a HALL MONITOR in GRADE SCHOOL and like I TOTALLY WORKED IT like I was SO GOOD I made like SCENTED PINK DETENTION TICKETS OMMMMG!!! BUT LIKE YA LESSON OF THE STORY IS LIKE, I am NOT AFRAID of ANYONE SO LIKE BRING IT ON ROAAAAAAAAAAAR; Points: 125 21 comments
PWDUTBTST (PEOPLE WHO DONT USE THEIR BODIES TO SELL THEMSELVES) Mar 21, 2011: TENGAGED!!! LIKE LISTEN UP!!

There has been like something that has been eating away at my fragile little heart for like, an entire three days now and like, I feel like it's something that just like needs addressing because I just like, need to.

LIKE I'm just MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS on tengaged, like going to the T Grocery store to get myself some lowfat klondikes which are like MY ABSOLUTE FAVES because like you get the same taste with HALF THE CALORIES OMMMMG!!! LIKE TOTALLY GO CHECK THEM OUT!!! And anyway, I go to the stars polebox because its final poll time and I'm just like OMG these people have probably worked SO HARD to like WIN THIS GAME STRATEGICALLY like, let me just go GRACE THE POLLBOX WITH MY VOTE!! AND SO I DID!! AND WHAT DID I SEE?!?

TWO SHIRTLESS GUYS!! TWO OF THEM!! LIKE???????

So I was like SUPER CONFUSED like WHY would these two YOUNG MEN put IMAGES of themselves SHIRTLESS by their faces for STARS?!? And then I was like O M G!!! IT BECAME CLEAR TO ME!! LIKE CRYSTAL CLEAR LIKE CLEARER THAN THE WATER IN THAT SEA THATS DOWN THERE AROUND THE BAHAMAS THAT I SAW ON A CRUISE ONE TIME AND LIKE TOTALLY SPLASHED IN!!!

THESE YOUNG UPSTANDING GENTLEMEN WHO PROBABLY WOULD HAVE FAIRED JUST AS WELL IF THEY HAD MADE THEIR STARS CAMPAIGN JUST ABOUT THEIR STRATEGY were POSING SHIRTLESS for the SOLE PURPOSE of like GARNERING VOTES!!!

YOU GUYS LIKE!!! LIKE!!! THIS IS LIKE TOTALLY LIKE A STEP BELOW BEING AN ESCORT!! THINK ABOUT IT!!! like, people log in and they see someone with a six pack and they are like CLICK CLICK WANT ME SOME OF THAT!! and like, that person could end up WINNING STARS AND A LOT OF T!! JUST BECAUSE THEY HAVE A GOOD BODY!?!? LIKE WHATEVER HAPPENED TO GAMEPLAY!?? STRATEGY!?! CLOTHED HUMAN BEINGS!?!? LIKE COME ON!!!

Like, one time when I was in fifth grade I was TOTALLY running for a presidential election, like my school had a little government, it was like totally precious. And anyway like, I was so running against this one girl named like SUZANA and she was like the BIGGEST FIFTH GRADE SLUT EVER like, her campaign slogan was like... VOTE FOR SUZANA, SHE'S SUGARY SWEET... LIKE NO SUZANA!! YOU ARE A BITCH!! and that sounds like a SLOGAN FOR PORN!! LIKE WHY DO YOU DO THIS!?!? so like, I totally made all of my campaign posters VERY CONSERVATIVE like I put up pictures of PUPPIES and KITTENS and like BUNNY RABBITS and like LYSOL and was like "BRI WILL CLEAN UP IN OFFICE" like guys that is like, a GREAT campaign slogan. AND I WON!!!

SO LIKE I am organizing an association called PWDUTBTST!! It stands for PEOPLE WHO DONT USE THEIR BODIES TO SELL THEMSELVES!! We advocate the appropriate use of body in all tengaged activites!! LIKE, we support the candidate who DOESNT use "sex appeal" in their star photos to try to get the win!! LIKE NO WAY JOSE!! LIKE LOL!! we support the candidate who like, like, like, like, PLAYED THE BEST GAME and like RELIED ON STRATEGY not FACIAL STRUCTURE to CLENCH A SPOT IN THE FINALS!! like, should you join this club, there are a LOT of fun events!!

We will be having a CHASTITY DANCE in which everyone will get to ASK SOMEONE FROM TENGAGED to like the BODY BALL LOL and like, you will have to be FULLY COVERED to GAIN ENTRY and like, like, you have to dance with a balloon between you two!! and then we will play a WHOLESOME GAME of DRESS UP POKER instead of STRIP POKER!!! Doesnt that sound SUPER FUN!! Like you just keep adding MORE LAYERS!! LOL!!! IM TOTALLY EXCITED!!

SO OKAY LIKE I'll be updating you all on the happenings of the club later on, like I just wanted to get the word out there that like, THIS IS UP AND COMING!!! Like LOVE YOU ALL!! STAY CLOTHED AND KEEP YOUR FACES OUT OF THE POLLBOX!!!!; Points: 111 16 comments
I'm so VICTIMIZED!! Feb 18, 2011: THE KID IS SO MEAN TO ME!!

Like, I'm sorry that you are JEALOUS of my beauty and want to have my boobs and like REALLY WISH that people stared at you longingly when you walked down the hallway in your sparkly bikini, but like, SORRY THEY DONT!! Like, you're just TOO OLD for people to find attractive and like I feel SORT OF BAD about the fact that you are clinging to your fleeting youth and taking out your agression on people who are like, prettier than you are, but like, GET OVER YOURSELF.

You ruined my birthday game, and then you like CONTINUE to be such a VILE ASS!! Like, WHATS WRONG WITH YOU!? You must be a GINGER or FAT or like a FAT GINGER like I don't even GET why you continue to be such a DRAMATIC HATER!!

NEG THIS ALL YOU WANT TO, but like as far as I'm concerned beyotch, you can kiss me where the good Lord split me!; Points: 43 18 comments
LIKE...EW!! Feb 3, 2011: It's come to my attention that there is like, a NEW COUPLE ON TENGAGED!! Now as the resident romance counselor, I am OF COURSE going to like give my take on them without even mentioning their names!!! It will be like A TOTAL SURPRISE and like PEOPLE CAN SPECULATE AND STUFF like that will be like SO fun because like, YEAH like everyone loves a good SCANDAL unless your name is WEST EDWARDS then you are just like, a DOUCHEBAG!!

SO ANYWAY LIKE this new couple is kind of making me want to THROW UP MY LUNCH!!! Like and I had a REALLY good and healthy lunch which some of you may want to try every once and a while [Blinks and Smiles] BUT ANYWAY LIKE GROSSSSSSSSSSS!!! Like, I am all for people who are OLDER dating younger people like its like SO GOOD that we can pass knowledge and sexual tricks on from one person to the next but like UMMMM why would you like DO THIS!? You know who you ARE too like, WHY would you date THAT THING!? Like, SO DONT UNDERSTAND!!! Like, I GUESS that like LOVE IS LOVE and all of that PIZZAZ but like seriously I would rather date someone who doesn't look like a cheese puff?? Like okay that may be a little HARSH and stuff but like COME-ON like WHY go cheese puff? If you are going to date a snack food and it just HAS to be of the cheese variety, at least make it a doodle. Like FOR REALZ!! And like, like, I so understand that like some people are just meant to fall in love like I have been engaged a lot so like, I so know how love works and operates but when you are GROSS you shouldn't have anyone date you, especially when like... you get REJECTED INITIALLY LIKE EL OH EL throw that cheese puff RIGHT in the trash, like totally for ser.

So like, my SUPPORT for this couple is like NOT REALLY EXISTANT!!! Like, I so wish them the best of luck in making their little babies or whatever it is they want to do with their life, like, not my place to judge but like, as the RESIDENT DOCTOR OF LOVE like for ser I totally got a degree like when I was little I used to play doctor like ALL the time and like, I think that like really a career in medicine is like my calling because I'm just SUPER clean and stable and like really good at all tasks that involve me making cuts and stuff like totally... SO LIKE.

COUPLE GRADE: D -

SORRY!!; Points: 75 5 comments
DATING WITH BRI - EPISODE ONE!! Jan 13, 2011: [Winks and sits on Abro's lap]

Du er for lækker skatter

Jeg elsker dig :*

[Pushes breasts forward, purses lips, and bats eyelashes]

Like, since my girl Jennifer is like learning new language tricks for her man, I'm like TOTALLY doing the same for mine!! Like, it is super important to like be international and like therefore like worldly in your romantic endeavors like take it from someone who has for ser been involved in like many different romantic relationships like if you start like moaning and it comes out in I don't know, like, Swedish or something like that they speak over there, your Man will become like TOTALLY hot and like will probably like be a lot longer lasting if you like CATCH MY DRIFT WHICH I SO KNOW YOU CATCH LIKE EL OH EL!!

SO LIKE, I was like TOTALLY a junior in high school and like was on the CHEERLEADING SQUAD like ADUH!? Because like if you WEREN'T on the squad or like didn't support the CONCEPT OF PEP! then like, ugh like, you wouldn't know like even what to do with your life because like chances are you were just some flat chested emo bitch with like serious self esteem issues, like that is so gross like you should NOT be a hater in any sense of the word like ew. SO like anyway my boyfriend Henry was on the football team and we were like SO in love, like he totally was the third guy I had sex with and like, I wasn't even sore after because he totally rubbed me down with icy-hot and it like SO WORKED!! [Poses for product plug] SO LIKE, and then like we were TOTALLY making out behind the bleachers like just DOING OUR THING and like I started like doing SUPER well like he told me, like, GOOD JOB BRIANNA you are doing like SUPER WELL like GOLD STAR like yeah he told me that and like he totally just got into my heart but like NOT THE POINT I was like THINKING ABOUT FRENCH CLASS because okay like DONT TELL HENRY but like there was this SUPER DELISH guy in my French class at the time named NATE and like I was TOTALLY THINKING ABOUT NATE WHILE I WAS MAKING OUT WITH HENRY LIKE!! and like, so I started counting in French and apparantly that like REALLY TURNED HIM ON so like he liked it a lot, so like.

THE POINT IS YOU GUYS like I am just here to help you all with your boyfriend problems. Like, seriously like, you may think that you can just go back into your closet and wear that pushup bra but you SO CANT. Like, sorry girls but like that extra set of squats is NOT WHAT HE WANTS AND LIKE YOU KNOW LIKE you shouldn't get like SEXY PERFUME EITHER because like HE SO DOESNT WANT THAT!! NO LIKE he wants you to SCREAM in SWAHILI!! he wants you to whisper tenderly in JAPANESE!! like he wants you to totally show up to his work in a lacey getup and take him right there on his desk while SINGING IN GERMAN!! LIKE OH MY GOD!!!!!!! WOOOOOOOOOO FOREIGN LANGUAGES!!!!!

This has been Dating with Bri, have like, a SUPERB DAY!!; Points: 50 4 comments

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

MissBriFlorida2007's blog

Confessions of a Beauty Queen

12345678 Posts 47 posts

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
Posts 47 posts