A CHLORINE STICK + WATERHOSE! (And a portugal man's porcupine)
This was a doozy, this incident happened together on the same day so I am including it all in one post. It was 4th grade, the second year after I was held back the first time. I really wanted this girl that went to my school's necklace, it had some like fancy jewelry and Saint Mary on it. So I slept with her father who was an illegal immigrant man from Portugal to get it. Later that day I was going past the mirror to look at the beautiful necklace I had now obtained, and I see some bumps on my lip... Which I remember could have been from that man, since he wasn't well cleaned and bumps like that are usually caused by herpes or an STD.
I couldn't tell my mom or anyone that I slept with this man so I kept thinking and thinking on what to do and finally remembered something. To clean a pool you have to put chlorine sticks in there to disinfect it. So I could put a chlorine stick in 'my pool'. I ran down the street, jump and scratching my cooter because now I feel I have some itching going down there. I finally get to the pool supply store run in look for the chlorine sticks, they come in one inch or three inch so I go with the three inch because I have a big ole possum and I really need a lot of disinfectant. So I go up to the guy at the pay area and I realize I forgot my money! The man clearly see's this and says "You're gonna have to give me something" and then I start questioning his intentions because I didn't want to have to prostitute for a second time today, but then he follows up with "I want that bejwelled Saint Mary necklace you're wearing." so it's an emergency, I'd rather be STD clean and stop the itching then the necklace which got me here and the first place, so I reluctantly give him the necklace.
Now I have the three inch chlorine tablets, I run into the Pool Supply place storage room, unzip my jeans and shove a chlorine stick in there. The itching goes away and instead a SEVERE burning starts, like twin towers falling down on fire burning feeling. I run out of there past the pool supply guy screaming "WHERE'S THE WATERHOSE?" while dropping the opened chlorine tablet's out of the box and scratching my possum. He points me to outside, and just says "wow wtf" and watches as I run out.
So here I am on the street outside the pool supply place, jeans unzipped, with cars going by, turning on the waterhose and sticking it up in there WITH the chlorine tablet. My possum is not, pumped, it's on fire. I have never felt pain like this before. Honestly I think burned a layer of skin off and that's probably why I had the odors in there which made me stick candles in it (TOP TEN THINGS I'VE STUCK IN MY VAGINA #8 for that story).
While I am out there with cold water running up my vagina from a waterose and cars are going by staring and honking, my mother comes up and drives me straight to the hospital "for a mental check-up" and there I also get some other tests done for STD's and the sorts. Turn out I must have got that chlorine stick up there in time because I WAS CLEAN! No STD's for me bitch!!
A CHLORINE STICK + WATERHOSE! (And a portugal man's porcupine)